My First Few Years in Ministry: What I’ve Learned About Calling, Loneliness, and Pastoral Growth
Written by: Piper Loewen
I was in Grade 10 when I first sensed God calling me into ministry. It happened at a youth retreat—one of those undeniable moments when you just know God is speaking. The speaker shared how, during prayer, God had placed a few specific people on his heart—people that He was calling into ministry. He invited them to come forward for prayer.
I sat there, heart pounding, convinced he couldn’t possibly mean me. Every insecurity surfaced at once: I’m too young. I don’t know enough. I’m not ready. I tried to dismiss it, but then, by the power of the Holy Spirit, the speaker began addressing the very doubts swirling in my mind, countering them one by one. That’s when I knew—I couldn’t ignore it. I had to say yes to what God was calling me into.
At the time, I had no idea what that yes would mean. Throughout high school, I served my church the best I knew how—holding doors open, shaking hands, brewing coffee, making cookies, and stacking chairs. Wherever there was a need, I stepped in. Then, shortly after graduating, I was invited to apply for a Junior High Ministry role. I was scared, but I applied anyway. And when I stepped into the role, I quickly realized I loved it.
It felt like God was redeeming my own junior high experience—those awkward, difficult years—by allowing me to walk alongside students navigating the same struggles. I saw firsthand how passionate and capable junior high students are when they are challenged to rise to something greater. I knew I was making a difference, calling students to live fully into who God created them to be.
Then, after a few years, another transition came my way. I was asked to step into a vacant Children’s Ministry position. And to be honest—I wanted nothing to do with it.
I had every reason why I wasn’t the right person. I loved junior high ministry. I didn’t feel ready to move on. The department had experienced some tough transitions. And, if I’m completely honest, I resisted the idea of stepping into the stereotype—the “Sunday school lady with the snacks.” But in His patience, God kept pressing on my heart.
“Children aren’t just the future of the church—they are a vital part of it right now. They don’t just need supervision; they need a pastor.”
Over time, He shifted my perspective. Children aren’t just the future of the church—they are a vital part of it right now. They don’t just need supervision; they need a pastor. They need someone to lead and disciple them into a real, vibrant relationship with Jesus. When I finally surrendered and stepped into the role, I saw the truth of that in a whole new way. As I’ve learned time and time again, saying yes to God’s call—even when it feels scary—always leads to something greater than I could have imagined.
Loneliness: The Hidden Challenge of Ministry
No one really warned me about how lonely ministry can be–and even if I did get a warning, it seems to be one of those things that you have to experience before you can really understand. You’re constantly surrounded by people, yet the weight of leadership can feel isolating. Friendships become complicated because the people in your church community are also the ones you’re pastoring and leading, making it difficult to know where relationships begin and end. It’s something I’ve wrestled with over the years. I've learned that even in a room full of people, I can feel lonely if I don’t have spaces to be fully known. I need people who truly get what I’m going through, who understand and are curious to explore the unique pressures and joys of ministry. That means that I’ve had to intentionally seek out relationships where I can be real, where I can be vulnerable, and where I can trust people enough to say, I’m struggling and I don’t know what to do. All that to say, I’ve come to learn that I can’t hold the weight of leadership alone.
I think that one of the biggest reasons why loneliness in ministry feels so heavy is that it is often a symptom of a misplaced identity. When my sense of worth is wrapped up in what I produce—the sermons I preach, the people I lead, the ministries I build—it’s easy to feel isolated when things don’t go as planned, when affirmation is lacking, or when I struggle to meet the endless demands of those around me. The truth is, before I was in ministry, before I led anything, before I discipled anyone, I was a child of God. And I still am. My calling to ministry matters, it’s an essential part of my vocation and the trajectory for my life, but it’s not the core of who I am. When I root my identity in ministry rather than in Christ, loneliness intensifies because my value becomes dependent on performance, approval, and outcomes. But when I remember that I am first and foremost loved by God—not for what I do, but simply because I am His—I find a foundation that steadies me through seasons of transition, discouragement, and isolation. Ministry will always bring challenges, but knowing my identity is secure in Christ allows me to face them without being defined by them.
My Experience in The Emerging Leaders Lab
“I can honestly say it has been one of the most transformative experiences of my ministry so far.”
This past year, I’ve been part of The Pastorate’s Emerging Leaders Lab, and I can honestly say it has been one of the most transformative experiences of my ministry so far. Being in a cohort with other young leaders—especially other women in ministry—has been incredible. These are people who understand what I’m walking through in a very real way. My guide is an incredible leader and having someone who understands ministry and can offer her wisdom and prayer has been so life-giving.
One of my most defining moments in the program came during our launch retreat in Vancouver. Another member of my cohort felt led to pray for me, and the words she spoke over me were exactly what I needed at that moment. It was one of those moments when God was working on my heart in ways that only he could prescribe. I’ve had so many of those moments this year, and I’m looking forward to all that the Lab will bring in my last few months in the program.
If you’re a young leader in ministry I want to recommend the Emerging Leaders Lab to you. So many of us are asking the same questions: “How do I keep growing? Who do I lean on? How do I make it through this moment? What’s God saying?” These questions and more are exactly what the Lab works to answer in an open, humble, and Christ-centered environment. It can feel daunting to think about adding another thing to your calendar—but the Emerging Leaders Lab is so worth it! If you want to be a healthy long-term pastor, you need people that understand you, that get you, and that can speak into your life in a uniquely pastoral way—you need the wisdom of someone who’s gone ahead of you. Add it to your calendar because it’s going to make your calendar feel lighter. Sustainable, healthy ministry isn’t about pushing through the loneliness and exhaustion—it’s about investing in what will sustain you for the long haul.
If you’re on the fence about joining the Lab, I encourage you to say yes. You won’t regret it.
Piper Loewen
Piper is the Children's Ministry Director at Soul Sanctuary Church in Winnipeg, Manitoba. Piper has served at Soul Sanctuary for over six years and is passionate about discipling the next generation and helping kids encounter Jesus in meaningful ways. She is a participant in the Emerging Leaders Lab, where she is growing alongside other young ministry leaders across Canada. Passionate about creating spaces where kids, families, and leaders can thrive, Piper is committed to helping the local church raise up strong disciples. She and her husband Jacob were married in 2024.
